You might think mindfulness and meditation – that stuff is too way out there for me. Or you may think, I don’t have any time to be quiet and still with these kids running around. Well, if you are struggling with managing your own thoughts and feelings and struggling to parent your children during this difficult time, you are not alone. We are all are struggling some way or another. Taking time to be still, quiet and stay in the moment are amazing tools us parents can use not only to support us through this pandemic, but through any time in our lives. They are also tools we can teach our children to assist them with managing their emotions and staying focused on what is important.
If you don’t know how to meditate, you can find many different apps or websites to provide you with the information you need. However, I’m pretty simple and prefer to just find a quiet spot in my house (typically in my bedroom with the door closed while the kids are watching a movie), put on some water sounds that I find online, close my eyes and just be. I focus on my breath, deep breaths in and long breaths out. When thoughts enter my mind, I recognize them for what they are and let them go with a breath. Just sitting, being quiet, breathing in and out for five minutes gives me so much peace that I feel more patient and have a much more pleasant attitude. We have all heard this before, when you feel good, everyone around you will also feel it. You can do this with your family too. You can be the guide for your children by quietly counting to five for each breath in and each breath out and reminding them to focus on their breath.
Although I’m fairly new to meditating, I have been practicing mindfulness for almost a year now. I have regularly throughout my day focused on what was happening in the moment and noticed something I loved about it. For example, the sweet way my daughter looked at me when she woke up in the morning, or the fact that we all got out the door on time (which rarely happened, but felt so good to focus on when it did). This didn’t come easy at first. I was always planning ahead and thinking about what time it was and what we had to do next. The more I practiced being mindful, the easier it got, and now I spend most of my day in the moment and have noticed a huge shift to a more peaceful me. This has served me well during this difficult time as I often throughout my day remind myself of all the things we have to be grateful for as a family and it provides me comfort and support. No better time to start than now, when we are not so busy with life outside the home.
I have practiced this with my family often. This can be done at many times during the day but I find it works well when I notice my children’s attitudes are more negative and cranky. I take them into my arms and give them big hugs and say let’s sit together and talk about all the great things about our lives right now. I find taking time to be relaxed and grateful really calms them down and helps them learn to find joy in the little things.
If you are fortunate to have extra time on your hands right now, this is the perfect time to try new things! If not, that’s okay too. I read a funny meme the other day about parenting while physically isolating that went something like this: sometimes you are flying high and the kids are eating organic meals and learning cursive writing and sometimes you are all in your pajamas all day eating takeout pizza and watching movies, it’s all about balance!